How much time do we spend waiting? Waiting in line – waiting at red lights – waiting for food – waiting for answers. I’ve written blogs about it before – WAITING – and am sure I will write blogs about it again!
I wrote that blog on August 24th – I was pregnant and didn’t know it yet! Here is a portion from that blog -
Now we wait again. We wait for a child. I have known from the moment I can remember that I’ve wanted to be a mother. That I was meant to be a mother. 2009 was a year for change. I quit my job – started a new one – we got a puppy – and found out we were going to be parents. We waited for our first appointment and waited more when the image I knew I was supposed to see wasn’t there. We waited for our baby to miscarry – waited to start trying again. Here we are – a year and a half later – still waiting for a miracle. Praying for a baby – our baby.
On March 28th of this year – Jared’s mom was given a word in church. That our children would rise up like mighty oaks. Our children.
On April 11th of this year – Dave called us again with a word for us. We would have children. Lots of them – running around in our yard – jumping on trampolines – and they would be our biological children – they would all look like Jared.
On August 15th of this year – we met with our Pastor – because I am angry, tired, sad, and weary. He told us that God has children for us – our biological children. But first we must open our hearts to the notion of taking in a child that is not ours – biologically.
So we wait and pray.
Because we are all waiting – for something.
For a new job – a spouse – a baby – a moment alone – a day without worrying about your weight – a friend – and for Jesus to come back.
I waited a little over week after writing that to find out that we were having a baby. Looking back on it now – it seems unreal. Looking down at this big belly that doesn’t fit in my tank top as I type this – seems unreal.
And still I wait. I wait for this baby to be born. I wait to hold him and cuddle him and love him. We wait to stay up at night with this little miracle. We wait to hear him say his first word and take his first step. We wait. Forever – we wait for something!
I am waiting to feel that first contraction and wonder when we should go to the hospital. Waiting for my water to break. Waiting for that moment when I wonder if I can do this. If I can get through this. Waiting to hear his first cry and see his face for the first time. To hold him in my arms and kiss his cheeks. To look into Jared’s eyes and thank him for this amazing gift that he gave me. To introduce him to his family and friends – people that love him and have prayed for him for YEARS!
Waiting to have him fall asleep on my chest and sigh that sweet baby sigh. To take him home and introduce him to Schrute. Oh – so many things are waiting for you baby!
I am so thankful for EVERYONE that has been involved in our lives! For those of you that sent cards and gifts and prayers and words of encouragement. For those of you that came to showers and SHOWERED us with love and gifts! For those of you that love him so much already! I am so amazed at what the world of FACEBOOK has brought to our lives! So many of you I would have NEVER met if I didn’t have this blog and a FACEBOOK account!
I cannot WAIT to post the photos that Bridget Reed will be taking during his birth! I just CANNOT WAIT for this moment to happen!
I am praying and praying and PRAYING for all you out there that are waiting for a baby. I am praying that God would pour out strength and faith and hope.
Until next time – I will be right here – waiting … for this baby – for YOUR news about a baby coming to YOUR family!